{"id":1047,"date":"2018-10-15T20:13:03","date_gmt":"2018-10-16T00:13:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sallybsedgwick.com\/conversation\/?p=1047"},"modified":"2018-10-15T19:44:10","modified_gmt":"2018-10-15T23:44:10","slug":"obvious","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/obvious\/","title":{"rendered":"Obvious"},"content":{"rendered":"

No, I didn\u2019t tell you. I just assumed that you knew.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Steps\"I don\u2019t know about you, but when things seem obvious to me, I don\u2019t even think about them. It\u2019s beyond thinking that they\u2019re equally clear to everyone. A communication about whatever it is really isn\u2019t even on my mind. This is why I\u2019m always getting in trouble because I don\u2019t mention things like, well, I\u2019m not coming up with anything because I\u2019m not even thinking about it. It just is. <\/span><\/p>\n

But you need examples? Well, for one, things are neater and cleaner when the trash is taken to the garbage bin. Another is that humans are all related. Also, apparently contradictory things can be true.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"PagesThese were just off the top of my head. But the first time I realized that what was obvious to me wasn\u2019t always obvious to others occurred during a misguided stint teaching English and theatre. Oh, I had\u00a0 <\/span>(still have for that matter) the credentials and could facilitate a discussion. But I was also expected to impart information, to \u201cteach,\u201d and, while I know a good deal about these subjects, I have trouble recalling facts or sharing them in any detail. In this instance the students were reading plays, but not participating. After a few classes that filled me with frustration, I caught on. Not everyone \u201csees\u201d (like having your own pop-up stage in your head) a play when they read one. So they have difficulty following the storyline. I do \u201csee\u201d plays in my head and assumed everyone read like this.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

I experienced this in reverse when a staff I worked with (technically I was the boss) refused to believe I wasn\u2019t just avoiding work when I suggested they pack up after an event while I sorted out the details with the hotel. The fact that they, and probably you, could put the same items into less space in a shorter amount of time than I could never occurred to them. Not my skill set. Someone can fold the SAME stack of clothes as I do and it will be two to five inches shorter than the stack I fold. Really. No matter how careful I am.<\/span><\/p>\n

On a day-to-day basis obvious things include thinking it\u2019s clear where you\u2019re meeting someone. Understanding likes and dislikes. Knowing it\u2019s perfectly fine and safe to be downtown in a city. Seeing what\u2019s polite, like having your change ready when you\u2019re in line waiting to pay for something. <\/span><\/p>\n

What are your concrete examples?<\/span><\/p>\n

\"SidewalkRecently, while increasingly living moment-to-moment \u201cin the present,\u201d which I began sharing in \u201cJust Be,\u201d<\/a> I\u2019ve crashed into other\u2019s expectations. As mentioned in previous posts, I\u2019m writing\/producing a short book explaining Spirit Moxie, which involves giving people a few concrete tools to engage in the important work of making a difference in the world. The purpose of the book is to give readers insights to see how, with a slight shift in intention, they can make a difference by doing what they\u2019re already doing. <\/span><\/p>\n

Dutifully I\u2019ve had several people read the preliminary manuscript and have received good comments and a few insights. But suddenly the purpose of the book, which was obvious to me, was perceived as not specific enough. Not personal enough. Too short (but I write \u201cshort,\u201d don\u2019t I?). The result has been this post, a lot of staring at games on my phone, and the occasional escape into a mystery story. <\/span><\/p>\n

I thought the book was<\/i> personal. And that the idea of making a difference was obvious. Somehow, while I accepted the needed challenge to clarify and rewrite. the actual process has not reflected the ease<\/a> I also think should be obvious.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"RiverThe hiatus of staring out windows and at keyboards has also increased my minute-by-minute appreciation of how interesting and beautiful the world is. It\u2019s increased my gratitude to the couple of people who have read the book and thought it had the right degree of personal-ness and length. And I\u2019ve gotten back to \u201cobvious.\u201d I now have a determination to look again at the book\u2019s beginning, to see where I\u2019m making assumptions. To indeed make it clearer and, ideally, more interesting.<\/span><\/p>\n

Meanwhile what\u2019s obvious to you? Keep a list. I\u2019ll do the same. And we\u2019ll see where the obvious keeps us from connecting. <\/span><\/p>\n

Oh, and thanks for engaging anyway. And not being too mad I didn\u2019t tell you what I meant more clearly. Together we can make a difference. Obviously.<\/span><\/p>\n

_______________<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"By the way, the book\u2019s working title right now is Moxie Moves: 10 easy ways to make a powerful difference.<\/i>\u00a0 <\/span>How does this work for you?<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

_________________________<\/p>\n

Photos from the top:<\/p>\n

Iridescent Stairs (why?) – Heartyjacques
\nPages from Our Town<\/em> by Thornton Wilder \u2014 Spirit Moxie
\nSidewalk Art (a good thing?) \u2014 Spirit Moxie
\nView from Bridge (beautiful?) \u2014 Spirit Moxie
\nPossible Title Page!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

No, I didn\u2019t tell you. I just assumed that you knew. I don\u2019t know about you, but when things seem obvious to me, I don\u2019t even think about them. It\u2019s beyond thinking that they\u2019re equally clear to everyone. A communication … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1047","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-asides"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s6DJHl-obvious","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1047","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1047"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1047\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1054,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1047\/revisions\/1054"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1047"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1047"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.spiritmoxie.com\/conversation\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1047"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}