![\"Spilt](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.sallybsedgwick.com\/conversation\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/3588715381_73ae8be559_b.jpg\")
<\/a>science and also while walking down the street and, frankly, eavesdropping, I\u2019ve been struck with the negativity and extent of the \u201cregret\u201d I’ve heard and felt. Regret that I didn\u2019t work on my poetry this year. Regret\u00a0 that I didn\u2019t wish the waitress \u201cMerry Christmas\u201d when I won\u2019t see her again before the holiday. Regret that I didn\u2019t take a couple of aspirin last night after drinking a tad more than I probably should have. And this is quite apart from the obviously life changing events that we regret: that one didn\u2019t look both ways and see the car going too fast; that one regrets, in retrospect, agreeing to the seduction of a stranger; that one didn\u2019t kiss one\u2019s sweetheart good-bye that fateful morning. Plus the overall regret: the niggling suspicion that those resolutions for 2014 are already toast.<\/p>\nOne positive thing about regrets is that they can be a useful heads-up. They may be part of a process of mourning, whether related to a death, error, or simple stupidity (at least that\u2019s what you\u2019re calling it). But the truth is that the longer we cling to that \u201cwhat if\u201d or beat ourselves up for that impetuous action (or lack of same), the longer we ourselves will stop living.<\/p>\n
Yup. Regret pretty much kills the moments during which it exists, keeps us from claiming the present, and blinds us to the multiple joys and possibilities that exist in any one moment.<\/p>\n
A few minutes ago I boarded a plane in one of those ubiquitous, strange, transitional, airports and realized after I found my seat that while I had my phone, I didn\u2019t have the case for it \u2014 the case where my driver\u2019s license and all my credit cards were. Major regret at not being more attentive. Panic at not being sure where it was. Desperation in trying to figure out how I\u2019d manage without the cards and ID. Anger at this one more manifestation of what I call \u201cmind fade.\u201d Frustration that there was a long line of people getting on the plane behind me that was preventing me from dashing back to the terminal.<\/p>\n
Now I could keep on regretting my absentmindedness and beating myself up for carelessness. But if I did, I\u2019d not see the sun on the snow below me, be impressed by my neighbor\u2019s unobtrusive friendliness, and marvel and be grateful for the empty seat, on an otherwise full plane, between us.\u00a0 On this flight, I\u2019ve learned that I really can use my headphones and no one can hear me. I used a beverage coupon that was handed to me out of nowhere a few days ago. And the retrieval of the phone case is now a good story (albeit, I hope,\u00a0 a warning to pay attention to my belongings).<\/p>\n Plus I\u2019ve had the opportunity to write to you. So don\u2019t cling to regret. You\u2019ll miss the possibility of what is around you. Right now.<\/p>\n ______________________________________<\/p>\n Photo credits from top:<\/p>\n 365, Beverages…..no use crying over it! \u2014 Andrea_44 Here at the end of the year and the beginning of the new one, there are multiple suggestions for evaluating our past year. What are your New Year\u2019s resolutions for 2014? Did you meet your goals for 2013? Did you … Continue reading <\/a>Suddenly there was a flight attendant doing her helping people board routine. She calmed me down with a \u201cI\u2019ll call up [past all the people getting on] and tell the attendant in the front. What does it look like?\u201d Shortly afterwards I got a thumbs up that the other attendant had it. And when it was delivered it included a printed slip with my name, itinerary and seat number, and what looked for all the world like an apology as if it was Delta\u2019s and not my fault.<\/p>\n
\nMissing phone case \u2014 Spirit Moxie<\/p>\n<\/h1>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"