As I got out my car in the grocery store parking lot, the kid wrangling shopping carts flashed me a smile and suddenly I felt feminine, attractive, interesting, and even a bit sexy. I didn’t know I was missing these, but his smile was really that powerful. I don’t know where it came from. I could invent all kinds of explanations on what it was really about. But it doesn’t matter. I still remember it. It still changed my mind and my day.

There is research, and lots of writing, that says it’s good for you. Andrew Newberg in his book in How God Changes our Brain has “Smile” as number eight in his list, “8 Ways to Exercise Your Brain.”  I think it is eight because it is the most obvious, but apparently smiling actually leads to neurological changes.

Meanwhile, smiling seems to be popular with researchers and bloggers, bosses and babies. One example is an article by Naomi Simson, Founder of RedBalloon, who talks about always carrying a smile with her and making smiles genuine. This is the basics of getting this right.

But that’s the rub, isn’t it? Is it right? Is it a genuine smile? Do they really mean it? What’s with that tight lipped look? Yeah, I’ll never trust anyone who looks like that. Or even why should I smile at that idiot, she just thinks she’s better than I am. I’m not making this last one up. Apparently people who feel powerful, even unconsciously, don’t smile at people who they think might be better than they are. Confused yet? But I wouldn’t take this research too seriously. If you want to expand your life, be healthier, and help change the world – yours and others – keep reading here!

For the point here is that this isn’t about what others do. Remember? This is about the small things you can do. Challenge the perceptions. Apparently when doing yoga a small, half smile helps you have a better workout. It sends messages to the brain that you can relax and all is well – and it has nothing to do with if you mean it.

Practice smiling at people as you walk down the street or cruise the grocery store, not because you’re happy, but just to elicit a response. It’s about wishing them a good day, great life, not about how you are. Although however you are I’m betting that after the third one your mood will be up and you find yourself looking for the most unlikely person to engage. That toddler who is “playing” with you when her mom isn’t looking? The homeless dude who values an acknowledgement he’s human? The well coiffed woman at the corner who will barely look at you? The TSA agent when you leave your driver’s license at security? (Yes, well, a rueful smile was all that was needed there.) My favorite is getting the checkout person who is having a no good, terrible, very bad day to smile at least a little. And yes, notice when you don’t smile (I’m important and so I won’t smile at you? I’m so tired and not sure if that person will engage?) and try one anyway.

After writing this I walked down the street and practiced. A mom holding her daughter who turned shy – and the mom and I shared a smile. The all-business guy who didn’t smile, but seemed compelled to ask, “How are you?” And the postman who yelled, “How are you?” with a huge, owning the universe smile.

So this is your homework. Practice. Report in. It will change you along with those around you. Promise.

Stories? Thoughts? How has it changed you and those you meet?

Photo credits (from top):
Smile Pendant – BlueIsCoool
Ethan – SpiritMoxie
Sonia Brooks – SpiritMoxie
Reminder – Ganasha Balunsat