Last night, tired and slightly under the weather, I came home, made a hot toddy, and went to my computer. The cord said, “fully charged,” but no matter what I did, the screen stayed an unresponsive black. There wasn’t a way to turn it off and on, and I couldn’t find a reset pinhole (wasn’t there one of those on laptops?). It didn’t matter what keys I pressed. So, I put down the lid and imagined, in the morning, writing a frantic email on my phone to some folks I had planned to connect with via zoom and an unplanned trip to the Apple Store.
And I went to bed. Apparently, I needed sleep, and I actually slept rather than worrying. One of the things I say is that my electronics support me—and if you let them, I’m betting they do you as well. I do believe in doing things moment by moment, so all I could do at this point was sleep.
Sure enough, when I woke up the computer was working just fine, thank you.
So how does the world work for you? Where does unexpected support come from? Or is the positive alien to your experience? Yes, you have the choice of either possibility being true.
For some there is the expectation and experience of everything going wrong. Electronics don’t support you; they need to be replaced. People can’t be trusted. Everything is too expensive. Yes, I have had to replace things. I could use new electronics. Most of my jeans and shoes and some of my shirts seem to be all worn out at the same time.
On the other hand, a new friend gleefully took it upon herself to rescue a dress I love that had embarrassing holes by adding butterflies and has repaired at least one pair of pants. I’m told she’s working on other things now just from the pure joy of it. Plus, all my electronics do work, thank you very much.
Right now, I’m in the process of finding my next place to live. After some discouraging “no”s, both from where I was looking and from my feeling a place wasn’t right, I went back to a couple of places I viewed last February. The price had gone up in the building I thought I liked the most, but in February nothing was available. Another, while still in a great location, was a bit iffy re management and didn’t have an apartment that would have overcome my concerns. But the third! Well, the price for this one is less than the others; the reasons it didn’t quite work in February have disappeared; and there are financial incentives for moving in now. No, the application process hasn’t been smooth, and assistance for a physical move isn’t in place quite yet either.*
So again, I’m called to presence. There are lessons here, including knowing it’s ok to depend on new friends, dream a little about all the options, and, apparently, the need to finish this Conversation.
This isn’t a Pollyannish existence. It is considering “pronoia,” that the world is working in your favor, vs. paranoia, that others (and everything?) are against you. While writing this I am conscious of a lot of evil and disaster in the world. You don’t need a list. How can one say that pronoia is possible when people suffer and cause suffering? When the housing doesn’t come through?
Pronoia isn’t really about what’s happening. Neither is paranoia. They’re about your reaction to what’s happening. Paranoia is seeing the Universe as out to get you rather than expressing curiosity as to how and what might unfold. Being willing to buy a new laptop, to explore other cities as places to live, and to rearrange one’s spending plan one more time for unexpected bills without viewing those bills as personal threats. It’s getting three hugs instead of one (because I actually like hugs), meeting two people headed out on trips that have at different times called me, and being reminded that one can get a lot of things just by asking (all flats for my wings and extra celery please).
So, when things aren’t going well, where can you see pronoia vs. paranoia? Can you offer gratitude in your current situation? (Gratitude and curiosity are two major responses if you want a happier and more abundant life.)
I don’t know about you, but, while I am realistic about the world, I’m voting for happiness and ease. I think it improves our actions, and our future, as we effectively hold to the premise that what we do changes the world.
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* Of course after this was written, assistance for the physical move appeared from multiple places.
All photos by Spirit Moxie. From the top:
Computer with blank screen
The resurrected dress with butterflies
Bear supervising the set up of a new apartment
Perhaps the most basic step or action to making a difference and changing the world and oneself is gratitude. Appropriately gratitude was one of the first “little things” we wrote about in Spirit Moxie’s Conversation posts. 
Surviving as a human is pretty much impossible without other humans. So we can see “thank you” as an acknowledgement of the web
Gratitude, on the other hand, is personal, although sometimes it is expressed publicly and certainly can be seen to touch thanks. Being grateful is not so much an acknowledgement of an action or experience as a perception of how that action or experience has affected you. Gratitude changes the way the world appears to us and makes us more productive and effective, a result scientifically studied by such writers as