So, what do we do?

Posted on October 7, 2020 by Sally B.

So, what do we do?

In the midst of this COVID-19 pandemic (late 2020), people seem to be spending most of their time stressing out about the world’s—and their neighbor’s—response to the disease, feeling despair and depression at being socially isolated, and lamenting the current political situation. Is this you? Any of it?

There’s something about complaining that scratches the itch, so to speak. We’re told not to complain, but I know that often when I complain about something, for instance that I can’t find something, it often shows up, usually where I’d just looked.

What bothers me about how we share our stress regarding the world right now is that all this energy, and yes it is energy, feeds negativity. Complaints about the world don’t resolve the same way they do when I lose something. These complaints actually expand the very negativity that is the basis for the lament. Sharing the stress doesn’t end with despair; it is fed by the despair. So, the brilliant put-down, the sharing of heartfelt hopelessness and emptiness, the latest study on how our Internet and other interactions are harmful feed this fear and induce and increase the depression.

How?

Isolation and physical distance have all become justifications for inaction. The extent of this inaction, which has become fairly pervasive, is so unfamiliar that it is perceived as threatening and, so, manifest as fear. Added to the inaction are the fear of death (from the disease) and helplessness. Remember, inaction (freezing) and fleeing (how many of you in the United States are considering moving elsewhere?) are responses to fear. Other fear responses are fainting (avoidance) and fighting, which looks like action for those of you with political leanings, but also shows up as people ignoring distancing guidelines and political realities or reading every news article, whether verified or not.

What you focus on expands. That may be a truism, but notice how much power we give away in all the above actions. There’s got to be another choice between doing too much and not doing anything at all.

Where are the things we can do that might, just might, be positive? Instead of fighting, what might heal and build? What might seed positivity?

Spirit Moxie on Facebook Remember when you discovered Spirit Moxie? I am assuming you at least liked the Facebook page. In case you didn’t get this Conversation post in your email, I’m adding a link to sign up so you won’t miss the next one! Remember that little nod when you admitted that you wanted the world to be slightly better? When there was a glimmer and a smile at the suggestion that maybe, just maybe, our small actions could morph into energy that could change the world? (Refresher course 101 on this idea if you don’t quite understand this – opening piece at www.spiritmoxie.com.)

Even in isolation, the world is still here. We still have family and friends and dreams. We can still change the world. Really. But if the accepted default is that of inaction, if we always do what we’ve always done, we will indeed keep getting what we have.

So, play with this. Literally. What can you do that’s new? What can you learn? The other day I figured out a new pattern for making my bed. Really. I’m still excited. Just the energy of claiming something new or different changes things around me. Acknowledge that you are “doing:”

Smile – even when wearing a mask. A smile shows in your eyes!

Reach out to others. Have you figured out how to connect via electronics? Have you walked someone else through how to connect?

What have you created? Art. An idea. A recipe. A new way to do what?

Have you shared your visions and your dreams?

Did you try?

Have you turned off your news feed or at least limited it? Trust me, you’ll learn what you need to learn. How can you stop giving violent and negative actions power while still holding those responsible accountable? Yes, the whole point is that what you do matters.

You have an answer to at least some of this. I’m guessing you, personally, are not called to curing this disease or running for public office. But small answers really can morph into a positive whole, even when that makes no sense at all. So, try a new form of pickles. Or whatever. Tiny little things still hold us together and whirl us into the future of our dreams.

And share. Share in the comments. On social media. In, gasp, conversation. Remember: “little things we do together.” There’s work to do if we dare.

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Images from the top:

Sidewalk challenge — Spirit Moxie
Website banner — www.spritmoxie.com
From Spirit Moxie Facebook banner — Michael Phillips

Wear a Mask

Posted on August 19, 2020 by Sally B.

Who knew that some “little things that can change the world” could actually descend upon us, rather than just arise from thoughtful conversations over coffee or wine, or during discussions about Spirit Moxie—(you know someone asks, “What’s Spirit Moxie?” You answer, “Well, you know those things that if only everyone did them the world would be a better place? How would you answer that?” Long pause and then wisdom. Always.)

Masks for sale But, with the COVID-19 guidelines, washing your hands, which we wrote about years ago, and wearing a mask covering your nose and mouth in public have become generally accepted as two things we can do to slow the spread of the disease. There’s also socially distancing and self-imposed (as well as officially imposed) quarantine. We’re also told to not touch our faces or eyes. (And how’s that going for you?) Overall, wearing masks and hand washing are the two actions I have heard about the most.

We can’t really monitor the hand washing of anyone but ourselves, except by hearsay. So, when we talk with friends, we focus on masks. “I went to the grocery store and no one was wearing a mask.” “Don’t people know they have to cover their noses with the masks.”

Some people are apparently threatened by the request, if not the requirement, to wear a mask. And to some degree I understand. When I was seriously sick a few years ago, my immune system was destroyed and I was given a box of masks by the hospital and instructions to wear one in public. The idea made me feel like a laughingstock. So when I went to the doctor for a checkup I had one with me, but kept making up excuses (e.g., “no one is standing close to me”) not to put it on. While I’m pretty sure not wearing that mask isn’t why I ended up back in the hospital, I remember my reaction and have tried to be sympathetic when I’ve watched people wearing them. For example many people in Bangkok wear masks because of the air pollution. But I wasn’t going to wear one while in Bangkok. Masks looked presumptuous. And a bit silly. So I understand the threat to image or convenience that some people may be feeling as a reaction to wearing masks.

With COVID-19, for the first few weeks I managed avoid putting on a mask, supporting my decision with information questioning their usefulness. Remember, mask wearing wasn’t a mandate initially. But then a friend of a friend mailed to our house masks she had made for us. Now I had one that was cool! Plus, I finally read enough from experts who agreed that everyone should wear one.

In many places, it’s now illegal to not wear a mask in public, at least indoors.

So, wear a mask. The science and official health guidelines are clear. If we all wore a masks, we could stop the spread of this disease.

Pee meme for facemasks However mask wearing still seems to be a big deal, or perhaps no deal, for some. The guys at the car repair lot didn’t even pretend to wear them. There’s always someone who doesn’t have theirs on correctly. (Yes, the mask has to cover your nose as well as your mouth. Think about it.) There is still, or so I hear, outrage at the idea of wearing a mask from those who want to think the pandemic is a myth. And the overheard statement, “Why do you care if I wear a mask if you’re wearing one?”

For me wearing a mask to slow the spread of COVID-19 is the simplest and clearest way of showing how a small action affects us all. Lately, I have been reading daily descriptions from my friend Tiffany Hollums who had a fairly severe case of COVID-19 and still has terrible symptoms. To protect her husband, who had just had major surgery and was at high risk, and her immune compromised daughter, she checked into a hotel (courtesy of family and friends) to quarantine after three close contacts tested positive. After about 12 days, she began having trouble breathing with additional symptoms manifesting every day. It took 25 days before she was deemed not infectious. There had been no new symptoms for three days (the current definition of “cured”) and Tiffany could finally go home. (The other guideline is ten days after your first symptoms – whichever is longer.) But on Day 40, this is what she was experiencing: “brain fog, fatigue, high heart rate (tachycardia), nosebleeds, chest pain (painful to the touch), profuse sweating if I get tired, weird dizzy bouts where my ears seem to ring, breathing issues, purplish eyelids and blister-like things on my eyelids.” These are her words, from the battlefield so to speak, “I think the more time I get away from being really ill, the most challenging thing is reading what others say about coronavirus. People still say it’s a ‘hoax’ or ‘just like the flu’ but that’s not what my body knows. And I vacillate between frustration, disbelief, and genuine concern that these people will get sick and know in real life technicolor that this virus is real and doesn’t care if they don’t believe it. I don’t want anyone to experience that or to say something that causes others to be less careful and experience this virus. Not to mention the lasting effects—which worries me greatly for others.“

You don’t want this virus for yourself or others.

Wearing mask at grocery store Remember, the way to change the world is not to complain about those not wearing a mask. Change and, in this case, health, comes through our positive actions (see our last Conversation “Conundrum”). Wear your mask. Play with what it looks like if you wish. Here, people are wearing bandanas or masks printed with political and social statements. They are experimenting with different fabrics and sport the most high tech ones or the simplest masks they can find. There are shields on children (apparently these aren’t as effective, but still help). And, yes, socially distanced folk take their masks off to eat and drink.

A little thing that can change the world. Easy. Post a picture of you wearing yours!

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Images from the top:

Masks for sale — Spirit Moxie
Urine Test Meme — Source Unknown
Facetime shot-connecting in quarantine-“[My daughter] proudly showing me her Animal crossing world she created with her daddy!” — Tiffany Hollums
B at Grocery Store — Harry Spirito

Conundrum

Posted on July 20, 2020 by Sally B.

“What you focus on expands.” This concept shows up in online business and personal growth courses, the teachings of Abraham Hicks as written by Esther Hicks, the current behaviors manifested in the political scene, and the rants of some of my friends. There are extensions to this idea. The statement that practicing gratitude creates happiness and success is one. Basics on the craze for learning about manifestation through such coaches as Mike and Andy Dooley are another.. Even the sexist and, for me, exhausting, 1937 work of Napoleon Hill Think and Grow Rich reflects this basic idea.

While I’m writing this we are experiencing a worldwide pandemic, with people ignoring that a virus is rampant by dismissing simple, if inconvenient, guidelines for keeping it from spreading. George Floyd was massacred in Minneapolis triggering a global confrontation with racism, both systemic and individual. Reactions to both events are being fed by history, politics, and newsfeeds.

Both also illustrate another truism (although I may have made this one up). “What you ignore festers.” In the United States our political leaders have encouraged – and ignored – acts of violence and white supremacy. As a result those who act this way have become more and more visible. Many people, including some political leaders, also ignore health guidelines and the impact COVID-19 is having on our healthcare infrastructure. The news, Facebook feeds, and, often, private conversations focus on inflammatory statements and the apparently ill considered behaviors of others giving these statements and actions increasing power. Each response is defended by “needing to know what’s going on” as well as, apparently, a need to be superior and clever. Note that these responses are focuses. Both the news and the cleverness add to the focus on the situation. And the energy from this attention encourages and fosters additional actions. In the pandemic, we have been encouraged to ignore the situation while others share how it is spreading, are given conflicting information about how the virus spreads, react inconsistently to which measures might be effective, and commiserate as to how unfair and difficult social distancing and quarantine is. There is also reassurance that the danger of the virus and the political implications of racial tension are exaggerated.

So more anger and violence. More illness and disease.

Yet what you ignore festers. Every time we don’t social distance COVID spreads. Pockets of white supremacy and the realities of unaddressed racism explode when given permission in our current political climate.

How do you address (i.e. not ignore) issues by not focusing on them? Absolutely one should name them – that is the not allowing to fester part. But the secret is to give more power or focus to the actions and stories that lift up and empower what you want to happen. The challenge is finding the positive focus. An easy example is Spirit Moxie’s continual emphasis on voting as a response to laws, government, and politics. It is police officers handing out masks at a recent demonstration. It is my friend Karen’s careful distancing measures at a family gathering celebrating her grandson’s fifth birthday where a great time was had by all. It’s my noticing all the people wearing masks vs my friends, visiting the same stores, saying no one was. (I saw only one person with no mask. Really.)

What do you see and notice that you can celebrate as positive and encourage? Delight in discovering Zoomers (i.e., people born after 1996) can be proactive. People practicing social distancing when you take a walk. Realizing it really is fun to cook from scratch – and tastes better. Watching and supporting an organization revising its DEI (diversity, equity, and inclusion) vision and guidelines. More fireflies and butterflies. Clearer skies. Do you celebrate the heroes in your midst? Are you grateful for honesty and clarity? Are you practicing gratitude period? Can you listen with love and really hear what someone is saying? What are your positive actions in this time?

Share! We need that focus to expand!

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Photos from the top:

You become… — cartoon by Andy Dooley
Pile of masks — Spirit Moxie
Imagine Banner at Salesforce Tower, WeWork. San Francisco, CA — Spirit Moxie

Note: all Amazon links are Spirit Moxie’s, which means we get a couple cents if you buy the book (or whatever), but that doesn’t affect the price you pay.

Plant

Posted on April 21, 2020 by Sally B.

Sometimes something is so obvious, you never notice it. This conversation began when a penny dropped for me, as they say, while a friend told me his neighbors had cut down the trees in their yard at the same time he was trying to make his own yard more friendly to birds, bees, and butterflies. It was a reminder that whether through greed, ignorance, or just plain habit, we seem to be increasingly hard on our physical world.

It was also a reminder that we can also respond positively to what is going on in our physical world. I’m writing during the 2020 COVID-19 pandemic. We’ve been sheltering in place and practicing social distancing, but at the same time, we’re hearing stories of dolphins being sighted in the canals of Venice (apparently, according to Snopes, true, but not necessarily completely unusual) and reading reports of pollution levels dropping so much that the Himalayas are now visible in India. All of these stories and conversations have made at least some of us more aware of the effect humans have on the environment.

As my friend has modeled, one response to our environment is rather simple, really. One way to change the world, the physical world and not just the people in it, is to plant things. Anything. Plants help purify the air and produce oxygen; provide food; and modify temperatures. Plants are not only components of medicine (you did know that most medicine is plant based?), they actually promote health and healing just by being visible, by our looking at them. It has been shown that people who can see growing things, even pictures of growing things, have less stress and so heal faster and are healthier than those who don’t.

I hear more and more of my friends talking about feeling renewed through gardening. Even now, when the situation we are living with limits us to varying degrees, these gardeners are poring over seed catalogs, raising seedlings, and even looking forward to weeding. Apparently such actions can have a calming effect.

Oh, you say, that’s all very well. But I have physical limitations. Plus, you’re living where there’s a yard and I’m not. Plus, the friends you talk about have the resources to buy plants. Gardening can be expensive. So, this is easy for you.

Perhaps. But let’s take this move “Plant,” one step at a time. One small change-the-world-action at a time.

A major piece might involve planting trees. Last week the people I’m living with planted a new weeping cherry tree. They even paid nursery workers to come to the yard, dig the hole, and actually plant the tree. In non-social distancing times, I’ve been given tree seedlings on Earth Day (April 22nd). Another friend found information on the number of trees we might plant to replenish the atmosphere. This article from The Guardian offers a tree planting plan that eliminates the effect of about 2/3rds of our current emissions. Maybe we can’t plant that many trees individually, but the article does confirms that tree planting is a positive action!

But planting trees might be a bit extreme. What about other outside plantings, for example my friend’s invitation to butterflies, the tomatoes we used to grow on the deck, the vegetable garden with flowers around the edges at another friend’s house? What might work for you? Vegetables? Flowers? Reseeding the bare places on the lawn? Perhaps, when we’re no longer isolated, you could become part of a community garden that not only provides fresh food, but promotes community and reclaims land. Or can you put a window box on your apartment’s balcony to share the pleasure of greenery with those passing below?

Then there are plantings inside aka houseplants. Do you have any? (Some people claim no green thumb. One friend even tells of killing an artificial fern!) Any plant counts, for example the cactus I was given by a lover when I was on a business trip. (True story. He wanted to give me a plant rather than flowers.) The ubiquitous African violets and spider plants. Some herbs on the window sill.

Yes, some plants are dangerous to pets. Others may or may not affect air quality. But all plants contribute to our appreciation of and the importance of regularly seeing growing things. If you think you have no access to plants, consider experiments like the getting an avocado seed to sprout and grow. You put 3 toothpicks in it and suspend it in a glass of water and wait. A cheap version of that gift amaryllis which occasionally develops a life of its own. One friend has an amaryllis that has grown and bloomed for the last 24 years—lasting longer than her marriage or any of her pets. Other friends might have cuttings from philodendron that needed trimming – another plant that can begin its new life in a glass of water as it grows roots. Plus there are multiple kits, simple and complex, for herbs and vegetables that can grow inside.

So notice. Act. Look at the plants around you. Plant something. Change the world.

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Photo credits from the top:
Lettuce seedlings — Kate Cook
Gardeners — Jeff Dey
Tree planting — Spirit Moxie
The cactus 12 years later — Spirit Moxie
The amaryllis — Teich Technical and Marketing Communications

Moves for Our Time

Posted on March 18, 2020 by Sally B.

This is yet another Coronavirus pandemic (COVID-19) message. It’s March, 2020, and this post is about the little things, the Moxie Moves, you can do right now to change the world.

Remember this crisis is about you. No matter your demographic, you can still be infected (even fatally) and no matter where you live, the real danger is to the healthcare infrastructure, that supports you. It can be easily stretched beyond its capacity.

Also remember this crisis is not about you, i.e. don’t take things personally [#22]. No matter your demographic, it is not just about protecting yourself, your lifestyle, or your theories. It is about daring to claim that you are part of humanity. It’s about our world.

First, be willing to be wrong [#8]. This may be the hardest action to actually do, but probably it’s always the most important. We find being right comforting, but the facts about this disease are skimpy. We aren’t 100% sure how it spreads. We don’t always know who is infected (including ourselves) because they may be asymptomatic. This uncertainty leaves us vulnerable to being manipulated. If any action is distancing you from your neighbor, not just physically, but emotionally, be suspicious [#7]. But still continue to respect rules and guidelines [#80]. One can be neighborly without direct physical contact.

Don’t obsess about the news. Fear and negativity affect our health. When you do read about this pandemic listen to facts from multiple sources [#57] and make certain they are confirmed. In the United States if you need to know more, try the official source cdc.gov rather than relying on Facebook or newscasts Globally try the World Health Organization.

Take care of your body [#98]. This means eating nutritiously (e.g., fewer processed foods) and getting enough sleep* [#90]. as well as remembering to wash your hands [#115], which we wrote about three years ago. So, you’ve been doing that all along, right? Avoiding touching your face unless you hands are clean has been emphasized by others. Apparently touching our faces is the only way we can get infected by the virus lurking on surfaces.

Be generous [#3]. Give a little more if you can when you tip [#100] when responsibly eating out if that’s still an option, or having food or other necessities delivered. Try to shop locally [#87] which supports vulnerable businesses and strengthens our local infrastructure.

Figure out how to responsibly stay positive and productive. Imagine this relates to the 2014 Conversation catch a firefly [#11]. Yes, it’s the wrong time of year. But right now we need delight, curiosity, and joy. Really look at things. Colors. Shapes. Ideas. Dance [#16]. Solo living room dancing is a known art form and great exercise (which relates to caring for your body). It also could be, if you reread the original post, a good metaphor for our response to today.

Respect others privacy [#79]. Everyone is responding to this crisis in their own way. Enjoy what you have [#26]. When was the last time you really appreciated your sock drawer? The pen collection? That odd gift from Aunt Susan? Ask for support [#2] [link] when you need it. Offer support [#66]. People are being very creative. What about you?

And finally, I remind you of two key Moxie Moves. Smile* [#92] at yourself in the mirror, at what you’re reading, at a pet or a photo or a tree. And give thanks* [#28] [link] about everything. The privilege of solitude. Food. Friends. Words. Give thanks for the challenges of social distancing, quarantine, health, and illness.

Together we can still, no, we can continue to change the world.

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The number in brackets [#00] is the number in Spirit Moxie’s current list of 120 things we can do together to change the world. There’s a link if there is a longer Conversation post about the move. An asterisk (*) means the move was included in our book Moxie Moves: 10 easy ways to make a powerful difference. We look forward to hearing your responses.

All photos are by Spirit Moxie

From the top:
Intertwined tree roots in Bangkok sidewalk
Toys: music, books, games
Sign from book launch party

Spirit Moxie

Little Things That Can Change the World

Tag Archives: COVID-19

So, what do we do?

Wear a Mask

Conundrum

Plant

Moves for Our Time